It’s 2022. This is not a debate we should have now. But we are. The debate over who is man enough and who isn’t.

It is Russia and Ukraine that are fighting a war and at the centrestage are two leaders in contrast — Vladimir Putin and Volodymyr Zelenskyy. As hospitals are destroyed, schools abandoned and city after city raided, we are holding our breaths to see how it ends for both countries. The analysts are at it, comparing Russia and Ukraine’s military might, area of control, manpower and natural resources. But moving away from these numbers and graphs, the mind wanders to the intangible aspect of the war — masculinity. If you are looking at this invasion from far off and are not affected by it in real life, all this would just feel like a well-made war movie. Who is the hero and who is the villain — Putin or Zelenskyy — is for you to decide.

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The story has two characters. Vladimir Putin is a leader the West has watched closely and called one of the ‘most powerful men’ in the world. Volodymyr Zelenskyy, who was not a ‘serious’ enough leader till a few days ago, is now a symbol of the country’s resistance. In the last eight days, we have seen how these two leaders have stood against each other and yet remained true to their personalities. As Russia fights Ukraine for a land called Ukraine, Putin and Zelenskyy are also fighting a psychological war, of how men ‘should’ be and if their personal traits are masculine enough.

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For several years now, and especially in the post-MeToo era, society has looked inwards to examine if the men in our society should also change their behaviour, or at least let go of the traits associated with toxic masculinity. At the two ends of this war are two leaders: Vladimir Putin, who, if we put it simply, is a perfect ‘macho man’ and Volodymyr Zelenskyy, a man who had nothing to do with war or weapons till now.

Vladimir Putin is a man you can easily associate with aggression and dominance. He rose to power in Russia and has remained in power in one way or the other since 1999. And when he had what he wanted – the president’s chair – he made sure no one took it away from him. In April 2021, he signed a legislation that will keep him in power until 2036, when he will be 83 years old. Now Putin is not your average politician. He is a law graduate and a former spy who worked for the elite KGB. He knows what he wants and takes it with both hands.

With his muscular body, which he obviously loves to show off, firm handshake and a tone as cold as his country, he falls perfectly under the old definition of masculinity.

He loves to show off his muscular body with numerous bare-chest photos. He is not afraid to use his bare hands in nature to tame wild animals or against his opposition at a martial arts court. He is a man who loves his guns and shiny weaponries.

And then we have Volodymyr Zelenskyy, who is running in the opposite direction and slowly redefining the definition of masculinity. He is a TV star and comedian at heart, and appeals to the masses from the heart. Zelenskyy has also studied law and economics but unlike Putin, the world has known him as a celebrity-turned-president who impressed everyone with his swift dance moves on the Ukrainian version of ‘Dancing with the Stars’. He does not shy away from looking like an average man, a man who connects with his military, gets respect without aggression. He often shares photos of his family on social media for the world to know that he is not standing alone and his wife and children also matter.

Until a few days ago, Zelenskyy was a comedian-turned-president, whom the world did not take seriously. But today he is a wartime president — standing strong with his military forces and civilians in their fight against giant Russia. Zelenskyy has chosen to lead from the front, rather than run away from the battlefield like Afghanistan’s Ashraf Ghani did recently.

Even in times of shelling, blasts and deaths, he has maintained his sense of humour – a trait not accepted in your typical definition of masculinity. Even while asking for a meeting with Putin to talk and resolve the issue, he says: “Sit down with me to negotiate, just not at 30 meters I don’t bite.”

So, as we wait glued to our screens looking at horrific images and videos, listening to the world leaders talk, take actions and end this war, I wonder what happens after this is all over. Zelenskyy, for many, is a hero for now. But will this continue even when it ends? Will the final result, his defeat or victory, will invariably lead us to look inside for something more. Will we finally accept this new definition of men and war?

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